(sighs) I think I finally overtaxed my body. (I only realised it now?) Haha, I can't do much but to rest and keep myself out of frustration's way. My head aches and the weather makes it all the more unfavourable.

I did fine in the cross-country race. I didn't win but I managed to finish without losing my breath. (I just kept on walking xD) My sports team is in second place!

Like previous days, I managed to dodge my homework again. Now I wonder whether I can do my homework?

I love having a junior, she sooo adorable! *cuddles*

May'n's K.L. leg of her Asia Tour is already up in ねこのめ while I've already updated Espressivo. My nengajou is in good progress! Photos will be up later ;)

(sighs) I think I finally overtaxed my body. (I only realised it now?) Haha, I can't do much but to rest and keep myself out of frustration's way. My head aches and the weather makes it all the more unfavourable.

I did fine in the cross-country race. I didn't win but I managed to finish without losing my breath. (I just kept on walking xD) My sports team is in second place!

Like previous days, I managed to dodge my homework again. Now I wonder whether I can do my homework?

I love having a junior, she sooo adorable! *cuddles*

Unbelievable, it's already February and only a month away from my birthday and my grandmother's first death anniversary.

"If you weren't born, I wouldn't have to get angry about this!"
"You so useless that I wish you weren't born!"

All of this, said to a young girl. Continuously slapped by her mother for not knowing her syllables in Malay. For exchanging stationery with her classmates. Writing a small letter word where a capital letter should be there. Not getting full marks in her tests.

"Is it a sin for me to do such mistakes?"

All of this originated from the rat race that the schools started. Going to good kindergartens, schools and renowed colleges and having a tutor or going to tuition classes just to get ahead of the others. 

"Why is a person's life should be like that?"
"I don't get it but I'm stuck with it now."

This carried on for years. Medicine was fed by force. Leaving books behind in school piled up with not being able to fit in with the other children. This reached a toll when she was nine. Thoughts of not living and ending her life right there loomed over her. She read information about people comitting suicides but what she had in mind wasn't simple things like slitting her wrists or just put a knife through herself. Without being killed or harmed, she wants her life to be taken away. That's all she wanted.

Being mistaken as arrogant, proud while being timid and awkward is all she had. Voicing out her opinion was never frequent because she was never right in her answers. Feelings are caged inside without understanding.

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I didn't expect this but this just happened. Written and amplified by my own thoughts, do you think a mother could say such things to a child? Is a child capable of such thoughts?

Comments are welcomed :D